The Ultimate Sacrifice
by AllOverTheWorld
Summary: Calleigh had never felt pain like this before and yet she knew it could only come from losing someone you love.


**Title: Ultimate Sacrifice **

**Author: AllOverTheWorld **

**Summary: Calleigh had never felt pain like this before and yet she knew it could only come from loosing someone you love. **

**Authors Notes: I will add this warning because this story does mention character death (several times actually) but I hope that does not discourage you from reading this sad little fic. Also I own no part of this story (except the two girls names, whose I have made up) so if you want to sue me go ahead but you won't get anything, plus I haven't violated any laws. **

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She had been engulfed by a sort of mind numbing pain that consumed her so thoroughly that she had no chance to escape its reaching tendrils. Rooted to the spot, about ten feet inside her lab, Calleigh stood there the tears welling up in her green eyes and threatening to overflow at any moment if she didn't regain some semblance of self control. It was now that the realization of what had happened really hit her, the true meaning of death struck her. She now discovered it was more than she could handle.

The pain she felt seemed to penetrate to her very core being, where she was powerless to fend it off any more than a gazelle against a lion. Her muscles felt weak but at the same time so taught it physically hurt her just to stand there. She didn't know what to do. No coherent thought would piece itself together and as hard as she tried the only thoughts that she seemed capable of forming was:

_He's dead. _

_He's dead. _

_He's dead. _

Calleigh wanted to cry. She wanted to scream. She wanted to shoot something. She wanted to kick. She wanted to punch. She wanted to fight. She couldn't do anything. She was literally paralyzed by her emotions which were running rampant around her body. Every time she closed her eyes his body, bleeding and broken, popped into her mind with blood seeping from his bullet riddled chest and she had to open them for she couldn't handle that sight.

An animalistic cry rose in her throat but she managed to keep it from shattering the silence in her lab as the tears finally started to fall. At first they rolled one by one down her face but the stream was soon unstoppable. Her legs began to shake and she stumbled over to her desk where she collapsed into the chair, unable to support herself any longer. Her body shook with the force of her sobs and at some point she stopped caring about who saw her like this, it was past the time for judgments.

She should never have let him go into the trade alone, unarmed. It was a trap, Eric had known it, Ryan had known it, she had known it and he knew it. Of course he knew it. She knew he knew the likely hood of him coming out alive:

"_Horatio" she said "Don't." that single word carried so much weight and so much meaning behind it that for a half second the red-haired Lieutenant almost changed his mind. _

_Almost. _

"_Calleigh." He said softly "If I don't two young girls will be senselessly murdered. I can't let that happen." _

_Their eyes met and she pleaded silently as she said "Their lives aren't worth more than yours. There has got to be another way." _

_He shook his head and took both of Calleigh hands in his own as he begged her to understand what he had to do "The girls will only be released if I am dead. This is the only way. Calleigh-" _

_She cut him off "How can you so easily accept dying?" _

_He paused for a moment "I can't. Calleigh I don't want to do this anymore than you want to let me but I promised that mother I would bring her daughters home. I have to keep that promise." _

"_At the expense of your own life?" Calleigh practically shouted, her eyes shining with tears. _

"_Yes." He said softly "Calleigh." He looked into her eyes and once again tried to make her understand "Calleigh I don't want to do this. I don't want to-" he stopped, his throat closing as he tried to force the words out before he too got emotional "I don't want to leave you." _

_A look of minor confusion flashed in her eyes before she understood "Horatio." She whispered but whatever she was going to say was silence as their lips met. _

Her lips tingled now in reminisce of that kiss the first and only time her and Horatio had ever truly expressed the depth of their feelings for each other. After that moment he had stood up and pulled her into a tight hug which lasted for what seemed like an eternity, but ended much too soon. As they separated from each other Horatio whispered "I love you Calleigh and I'm sorry."These words too joined the echoing in her mind as the only thoughts she could seem to form, the last words Lieutenant Horatio Caine ever said to her.

_He's dead._

_I love you._

_He's dead._

_I'm sorry._

_He's dead._

_I love you._

_He's dead._

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**So don't kill me please. I wasn't in the mood to write for either of my other stories and after having a bit of a disastrous day this idea popped in to my head whilst I was stuck in traffic. I have a potential second chapter to add to this but for right now I think I'm going to keep it like this. I do not intend to turn this into a story but at most it will be a two shot. **

**Let me know what you think and if you so desire a happier ending then I can post the second chapter however I am content to leave it like this, although Horatio dead is never a happy thing. Thanks for reading. **

_**AllOverTheWorld **_


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